Once upon a time,
I used to be this person, one; who was afraid of almost every thing. Afraid of
loosing the persons close to my heart, afraid of letting a thing or phase go
from my life, afraid of leaving familiar places, even afraid of missing a local
train(true story, not an exaggeration..!) and just portray a whole gamut of
similar or non similar things, I was afraid of all of them. Life was not less
than a disaster, I used to cherish the past and good times that I spent, ignoring
the present; I was destroying and the future; I was wasting. I spent whole my
childhood reciting the lines of Rudyard Kipling,"If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And-which is more-you'll be a man my son!"
However; I could never apply them in my
life for two reasons-
1.
Firstly;
as I mentioned I was too afraid of any change to take place or of taking a
risk(no really, things go faster than you think).
2.
Secondly;
I assumed Rudyard Kipling was addressing men not women(winks..! ;) )
But I tell you, life was not good back
then, I felt like dying a hundred times everyday. I couldn’t gather the courage
of living with a change and made my life stagnant. But somehow I always had a
feeling that this is not my destiny, this is not what I am. My mother is a very
strong person. I asked her once, “ Mom, which and where was the best time of
your life?” She replied, “ Now, now is the best time of my life, where is
immaterial. Try to make your home wherever you are. Life without changes can
not be considered as life because life moves on”. I loved the idea but I didn’t
know how to imply it in my life.
After some very significant
events that occurred in my life, I got to know that my gut feeling was right. As some events change your thinking, some change your way of living but those
events changed me from ‘what I was’ to ‘what I am’. I became an acolyte of
changes and risks. I’m not saying each of the things I did, fetched me with
fruitful results only, some of them even provided me with horrible consequences
but nothing could snatch my peace of mind hitherto. I started experiencing every
color of life by widening my purview and thus I realized what kinds of joys
fearlessness provides you. Truly said,
“Cowards die a thousand times before
their deaths,
The
valiant never taste of death but once…!”
